This Blog Post Will Probably Kill You. So, My Bad.

I saw this on my friend’s Facebook wall last night:

dead

This photo was taken in a hospital after the patient in the bed was in an accident where he was responsible for a young woman’s death

It is said that when you see this image and do not share it, the woman will look for you during the night to collect your soul.

A couple in a western suburb area of Sydney saw the message and ignored the picture without sharing it. This couple was murdered by their 15 year old neighbor who claims to have been possessed by the woman.

A 28 year old woman in Whittlesay Road, Cambridgeshire, England, was run down by a car driven by another female that fit the description of the woman in the photograph, the police investigation revealed that the murdered lady had ignored this picture only 4 hours before her untimely death and did not pass it on.


So… okay. A couple things.

First. Really sorry I shared this. I just did not want to be killed by the ghost in this picture. Also, I’m really trying to increase traffic to my blog without resorting to seeding it with phrases like Jennifer Lawrence Alex Rodriguez Sochi sex tape.  I promise not to be offended if you don’t share this blog post. Of course you are still welcome to share this blog post andnot die.

Second. In the future (and by in the future that assumes that you did share this blog post and did not die), if you see a picture like this. Anywhere. You owe it to your friends to not forward it. I’m sorry, but you simply have to suck it up and die. Because odds are, at least a few of your friends are going to just glance at it, and maybe even like it without reading the dire warning.

Or you get somebody like my dad who told me he was bringing his new tablet back to Office Depot because it didn’t have “the Google” on it. My dad would try to share it and end up pasting it to his desktop, or buying an Arapawa Goat on Farmville, or probably just deleting his facebook account.

Third. Whatever you do, if you do share the photo, share it responsibly.

Don’t use this photo for evil even if you have the best intentions. Don’t be like:

Screen shot 2014-02-21 at 9.44.05 AM
Fourth. Some of you may be thinking. Dude. You’re an idiot. That story is not true. In fact, that picture is just the cover art from a 2003 Thai horror movie called “The Unborn”.
 the-unborn-2003.13975
To that I say, “Is it? Or did those clever Thai horror movie producers find a great way to ensure that people would share the cover art of their DVD? Share the cover art or die.
Because a google image search has found a slew of other savvy marketers using this image with the same idea. In fact, this image plays heavily in how some of our most famous products have been marketed.

cokemcdonalds

ipod
In fact this image ran in the paper over Washington’s Birthday!
 sleepys
I also like to think about the people mentioned in the original story. And I wonder what stories were attached to the picture when they got it?

A couple in a western suburb area of Sydney saw the message and ignored the picture without sharing it. This couple was murdered by their 15 year old neighbor who claims to have been possessed by the woman.

“Oh, crikey Bruce. What are you looking at?”

“Oh. ‘ello Matilda. I’m just surfing some porn before goin to bed and I came across this nasty bit of stuff.”

“That is nasty. Do you think we ought to share it? Like the post said?”

“Nah. Nothing to get your wombat riled up about. We’re in the middle of the Outback. I don’t think her ghost is going to find us here.”

“Alright. Are you coming to bed?”

“I’ll be up in a bit. Just a quick wank and I’ll be up.”

“Alright. You’re not going to share it after I go to bed are you?”

“Nah. Be right up my little kangaroo.”

—–

 A 28 year old woman in Whittlesay Road, Cambridgeshire, England, was run down by a car driven by another female that fit the description of the woman in the photograph, the police investigation revealed that the murdered lady had ignored this picture only 4 hours before her untimely death and did not pass it on.

“Sorry about your mum.”

“Oh thank you officer. But it was my sister, not my mum. You’re ever so kind. More tea?”

“If it’s not too much trouble.”

“Perish the thought. Crumpet?”

“Oh. How lovely. Now you spoke to her last night?”

“Oh yes. I called her on the phone. I asked her if she was having a nice night and she said she was.”

“Did she say what she was doing?”

“She said she was looking at photos but not sharing them.”

“That’s what she said?”

“I know. I thought it was funny. I mean if she didn’t mean to share them why would she bring it up?”

“Do you know if this is one of the photos she was looking at?”

dead

“Ooh. I hope not. That’s right scary that photo is.”
“Okay well we appreciate your help. Thank you for your time. Again, sorry about your sister.”
“Oi. Is that one of those photos you’re supposed to share?”
“What?”
“You know one of those photos that if you look at it and then you don’t share it, the ghost of the lady in the photo comes and takes your soul out of ya?”
“Well, it is. But I’m afraid this is my only copy.”
“Alright. Fair enough.”
—–
So in closing, please share this blog post. Or may God have mercy on your soul.*
 
*Now you may have noticed that I read the original story before going to bed and I didn’t die during the night. While I was writing this morning there was a very persistent knocking on my door. As soon as I pressed Publish, the knocking stopped.
 
Coincidence?
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